Today, my parents and Grandpa are in Iowa saying goodbye to my Grandma, Barbara Macy. Grandma passed away June 18th, and her memorial service was July 15th, but today is the graveside service. We (my siblings and I) were not able to make it out there for the “final” goodbye, so in honor of Grandma, I wanted to share what my Dad read at Grandma’s memorial service.
Mom was raised as an only child by her wonderful mother, who worked a government job that included lots of moves. All those moves during her growing up years caused Mom to purpose that her children would someday have a different sort of life, one that felt more stable with deep roots.
While at nursing school, Mom fell in love with the man of her dreams. After they married during her last year at school, they lived in an old, rented farmhouse with running water, which, as Dad says, “meant that someone would run out to the well, pump the water, and then run back to the house with it.” Thankfully, they had electricity, because when the furnace would stop working in the dead of winter, Mom would turn on their electric oven, open its door, sit down in front of it with me on her lap as an infant and rub my legs to keep me warm until Dad came back from working in the fields. Sometimes, Dad just had to pack us all up and drive to his parents’ farm because of the extreme cold.
When their landlord sold the farm they lived on, Mom and Dad decided to move to Palmdale, CA with their two little boys in February 1957 for a couple of good reasons. They had family out here, and there were job opportunities for both Mom and Dad. (And... As an aside, Dad did honor Mom’s wishes. They put down roots here in the AV, and still own their original home. Terry and I still live here, too, though I've moved to distant land of Rosamond.
Mom was quickly hired as an RN at AV Hospital. As Mom and Dad wanted Terry and me to have at least one of our parents with us as much as they could manage, Mom worked the night shift and Dad worked days. Now as an adult with my own family, I realize what a sacrifice that was for my parents. I also need to add that if either Terry or I got hurt, we always went to Mom to get patched up. Her manner was so very kind and loving.
If you were to describe Mom’s major love language, it would have to be gift giving. She loved to give gifts to her loved ones! I will always remember one very special Christmas. Our family business was just getting started, and finances were tight. However, come Christmas morning, Mom had somehow managed a Christmas miracle for her boys. When Terry and I woke up, we found two brand new 3 speed bikes by the tree! Mom had been faithfully putting a little money aside every pay period for the entire year to surprise us.
As I said, Mom was a nurse, and a very good one. Over the years her coworkers have told me just how gifted she was. One Saturday sometime in the 80’s, I stopped by the hospital while Mom was on duty to say “Hi” and to give her a hug. As I walked down the hallway, I saw her in one of the rooms, gently caring for her patient, tending to an IV, checking vital signs, and giving meds. I just stood there and watched, thinking, “Wow! That's my mom.” Someone once told me, “It takes a special person to clean up a messy patient and then later give them a kiss on the cheek when they are discharged.” Mom was that kind of special person.
Because Mom was somewhat private about her faith, I didn’t really know for sure where she stood with Jesus. I knew she enjoyed the fellowship at this church, and I knew, too, that my mom was pretty amazing. Had she wanted to, there was a lot she could have boasted about, though of course, she didn’t. However, neither her good standing at this church nor her natural goodness was enough to give her eternal life.
Ephesians 2:8-9 states “For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not of your own doing, it is the gift of God, not a result of works so that no one can boast.”
The last three months of Mom’s life here on earth gave us many opportunities to pray with her. Throughout that time, Mom would say over and over that she was scared. We would ask her what she was afraid of, and her answer was always the same. “I don’t know.” Along with Dad, we would try to reassure her, but nothing seemed to help.
On one such occasion, our daughter Hannah was with her grandma in the bedroom, while her youngest sister was with their grandpa in the front room. Nothing was calming Mom’s heart, and Hannah’s heart was breaking. Fighting back tears, Hannah told her grandma that if she’d ever done anything wrong at any time in her life, the Bible said that she could confess her sins, and that Jesus would be faithful and just to forgive her and to cleanse her from all unrighteousness. She reminded her grandma that no one can take those who belong to Christ out of His hand and that He’ll never leave nor forsake them. Mom was quiet for a few minutes. Then lying there on her side on the bed, Mom raised her hand and said, “Jesus, Jesus! I love You, Jesus! Oh, how I love You, Jesus! Oh, sweet Jesus!” Then Mom said, “Jesus, Jesus, You’re my Savior! I love You, Jesus!” Peace filled the room, and Mom’s heart. Romans 10:13 says “Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.”
After Mom cried out to Jesus, Dad shared with us that although she had never been one to pray much, she had begun to pray to God during the night.
I am so grateful to know with confidence that I will one day see Mom again along with every other loved one who has put their faith and trust in Jesus. This longed-for reunion in presence our Lord is something that I know mom would wish for each of you to share in. Till that day, I know that Mom would want each of you, her beloved family and friends to know the peace that passes all understanding which can only be found in Christ.
As you can see, Barbara Macy truly was a remarkable woman. However, the most amazing part of her story didn’t come until the end of her life. It was so difficult for everyone to watch Grandma suffer with fear and pain during those last months, but God is faithful to bring beauty out of the most painful situations. I am so very grateful to know that this goodbye on earth is only temporary. We will see Grandma again, one day soon.
